Saturday, 31 December 2016

Sh......t Happens

You can't believe they are on safely

Visiting my daughter a few weeks back, she had a frantic phone call from a good friend: they had gone on their annual cycling holiday with their four children and arrived at their destination.  All the bicycles were strapped to the back of the car with an impressive, anti-theft, Thuli lock.  The only thing was the key to the padlock had remained 800 kilometres away, at home, with their house keys.  This was alleged to be the wife's fault. So my daughter's task was to pick up the precious key from another good friend, who runs a shop close by to said house, trailing myself and my husband with her through a very congested part of town (which was good as we could sit in the car, double parked with the engine running), while she ran in to retreive said key. Then we had to high-tail it to another part of town where a courier was known to be found and express the key up to the grateful family.  It all goes to show, I thought, it's good to have good friends and even better that it's not only the older generation that forget important things.

Saturday, 17 December 2016

Seeing the Funny Side

Sorry - the nose hair images were gross! (Google)

When you are as big a fan of 'The Big Bang Theory' as we are, it becomes tempting to talk to each other as critically as they do, without ever taking offence.  I am reminded of an episode when Amy is offered her first-ever bikini wax by her friends in anticipation of her first sexual encounter with Sheldon, which he reluctantly agrees can be her birthday present from him, he will make a present of his 'genitals' as he puts it.  Our own conversation post-show went more-or-less thus:

Husband:  That reminds me, isn't it time you borrowed my nose-hair machine again?
Me: (annoyed) :  That's really romantic.  I suppose every time we make out you have been thinking my nose hairs are a metre long?  But since you mention it, can I also borrow your foot-sanding machine?
Husband:  I suppose you are implying that my heels are shredding the bed sheet again?
Me:  If the cap fits. Remember when your son-in-law suggested you must be careful not to trip over your toenails when you wear sandals?
Husband:   I'll get you the machines.  (A pause).  And a side-cutter for your nose hairs.

I wanted to be cross, but I packed up laughing.  

Thursday, 8 December 2016

The Weird Thing About Plastic Surgery

An honest plastic surgeon!  (Google image)

I've just watched a TV show featuring Dolly Parton (as she is now).  I never quite realised what a tiny person she is, especially since she has had her famous assets reduced. She was asked how she maintains her look. She laughed her delicious, ageless laugh and put it all down to her good doctors.  As she has famously said,  "If I see it baggin' and saggin, I get it nipped, tucked or sucked right away." Apologies if this is not quite an exact quote. She calls herself a "Backward Barbie" like the song she wrote (and what a great songwriter she is). And how exactly like Barbie she looks, if a little drawn so tight is her face. It's a little weird to see her now, almost looking like she always has. Of course, it's different for celebrities who want to keep their fans happy or for anyone with money and a fear of visibly aging. Then I watched  British show a bit like "Grand Designs"; all the couples with amazing homes that were featured were clearly well-heeled pensioners, and all were still as nature intended, saggy chins, eyelids, wrinkles, the lot.  How weird they looked.  I thought found myself thinking, "they could at least have got their eyes done". How brain-washed am I? How I envy them, happy in their own skins.

Monday, 5 December 2016

Water Saving Fun

Google image

Parts of South Africa have had bad drought for the past two years and our municipalities have finally woken up to the necessity for water restrictions.  We saw some of the writing on the wall two years ago, and have now three large water tanks, but last month the valve that goes to our garden irrigation got stuck in the 'On' position while we were in Cape Town for 3 nights and we got back to a very large water bill.  So we have started our own efforts to save water, beginning with catching our shower water in buckets which we use to flush the toilet or carry downstairs out to the garden.  One day I tried to collect the rinse water from my washing machines but nothing big would fit in the basin under the pipes except small bowls from my kitchen and I got quite flustered trying to tip these into available buckets and there was a lot of water I didn't manage to get. Meanwhile, I have got a bucket system with a rope and a hook, to lower buckets over the balcony down to the garden.  My husband has promised to apply his mind to organising the water with some kind of attachment to the pipes which can hang down to the garden and avoid the need for buckets. Meanwhile, we are getting quite a lot of arm exercise, as our kitchen and washing facilities are upstairs (built this way for the view over the lagoon). But we need to buy a few more buckets.  One suggestion has been to buy a very large basin to stand in under the shower.  That way we should be able to save all the shower water. One good thing: our plants are growing like mad, appreciating all the phosphates etc. that are in the washing machine's water.