You won't believe what I have spent my Sunday afternoon doing! All guesses incorrect. I have been cleaning beneath my toilet seats. Needless to say, as I am expecting VIP visitors next week, I have been obliged to clean my house and while doing a bit each day for the last week, I remembered that my sister-in-law once confided to me that wherever she visits, she lifts the seat to see if the underside has been cleaned. I may just add that she is one of those anal people who won't sit on a public toilet, no matter how immaculate the location. She squats in mid-air (you can only admire her muscle tone). As she would form part of the family grape-vine, I decided to check mine out. Horrors! Yellow stains under all four toilet seats. That is not the shocking part. This is: For 38 years (the length of my marriage) I thought the seats turned yellow with age. In my defence, I have tried to clean these areas with various kinds of bleach: to no effect. Thank God for Google! I discovered that many people confess to the same problem but unlike me, acknowledge that these are urine stains. I hide my head in shame. However, there was light at the end of the tunnel - it was commonly agreed that a paste of Bicarbonate of Soda (that magic stuff) and vinegar (another amazing cleaner) would do the trick. One respondent did mention the addition of elbow grease and a scourer. This advice nearly resulted in my reaching for my asthma pump, but did achieve the desired result. I can now almost brag about the cleanliness of my toilet seats' undersides, except for that little area around the hinge. When I announced my intention to my husband yesterday, he helpfully suggested that he remove the seats in the interests of thorough cleaning, but I refused, envisioning extra work for myself. However, I haven't been able to do the hinges properly. I know my husband: when I show him my good work, he will have a look, remove the seats and finish the job himself.