Thursday, 13 June 2013

A Case of Dropsy

Google image

No, not the mediaeval term for fluid gathering in various parts of the body: we have had a spate of dropping and breaking things.  Our excuse is that nothing has been in it's rightful place because our cupboards were emptied after our flood and stuff has been stacked precariously all over the place. Still, I'm not sure that is really why I broke four wine glasses and a flower vase during a two-week period, and my husband - two clocks. Without further explanation, one might be tempted to think that I am an alcoholic who staggers about the house constantly inebriated and tripping over things, and that my husband has a grudge against clocks. Not so. Each casualty has a perfectly reasonable explanation - in my case, I am always in a hurry and clumsy by nature whereas my husband side-swiped one clock off the wall while trying to carry a pile of chairs back to the kitchen and the other while pulling a wire through the wall to re-connect the televisions to each other. Neither of us has the best of eyesight. Our very worst has been that we dropped our newly acquired i-pad and were surprised that it's glass broke and astonished at the cost of replacement. Luckily, I had remembered to insure it and the insurance paid for the repair in full.....Well, after that really uninteresting post, I plan to attract more readers to my blog by entitling the next one,  "Granny Porn". No, really, watch this space.....

Thursday, 6 June 2013

Giggle from Cold Cape Town

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I have to confess that 'cold' to us is a relative concept, not meaning snow or frost. Indeed, even our nighttime temperatures rarely go below 8 or 9 degrees C. No, cold to us means heavy rain for perhaps three days on end after the passing of one of our rainless summers, before the sun shines again. Thus, most of us here don't know the meaning of the words 'central heating' but when it rains we feel exaggeratedly chilly and make a great fuss. So it was that my husband instructed me to ask Big Son to return our oil heater which has been on long-term loan to him for the last three years, since he and his family returned to SA from the UK and lived in a flat which suffered from damp. As they also had a new baby, we 'lent' them our tumble-dryer as well.  "Tell him," my husband said,"that we are freezing our a......s off here."  Further, I was not to feel sorry for them as Big Son had let slip that he had spent £75 on a light for his bicycle while working in the UK last month. So I duly made the request in these very words as soon as Big Son next set foot in my house. Somewhat taken aback,  "I thought you gave us that heater", (Big son's memory is short), he agreed to return it.  Five minutes later, my telephone rang: my daughter, "Please tell M that we are freezing our a.......s off over here, and can he please give back the gas heater we asked him to look after while we moved house."  Shame.  I didn't feel I could ask for the tumble-dryer on the same day. I'll leave that until the next 'cold' spell.

Wednesday, 5 June 2013

A Retro Cautionary True Story

google image - only in India?

When my husband worked at SAA in a former life, there were not so many safety factors as are around today. The staircase up to the plane had to be pushed up to the doorway for the passengers to ascend and as the plane got heavier the more people boarded, so the top step would sink a little, sometimes quite a lot. One day the gap was so wide, a little old lady, struggling up with her hand luggage, fell completely through onto the Tarmac and was killed. Her hand luggage was found to weigh 28 kilograms! Several thoughts spring to mind. My first thought was "Crikey, how strong she must have been!" My    Husband once staggered up the steps with 20 kilos of frozen warthog in his hand luggage (also many years ago), with quite a strained expression on his face but he's quite a big man. Other thoughts - why did no-one try to help her?  Today, there are x-ray machines etc but here, especially on our domestic routes, airport staff turn a blind eye when passengers take last minute extra hand luggage from relatives just before they go through the security gate. This practice often means there is not enough space in the overhead lockers to the annoyance of law-abiding travelers. But there it is, there are no sanctions, when people realize they can get away with things, they will. What was in that old lady's luggage must have been worth it to die for. Wonder what it was?