Monday, 5 November 2012

More re Hospital Visit...

I made my arrow big and straight

I forgot to mention two things re my hospital visit. Firstly, there are the lengthy forms to fill in. We all know that these must be signed on every page to protect the hospital from being sued and to protect the doctor from any kind of failure, should his best efforts prove to have less than perfect results.The longest bits of the form are to make sure everyone gets paid. No money, no go. There is a new twist though since my last visit - I was handed a pen and asked to write a paragraph describing in as much detail as I could what I understood was about to be done to me, with the emphasis on whether the RIGHT or LEFT foot was to be worked on. Even this was not considered sufficient: on arriving outside the operating theatre I was given an indelible, black pen and had to draw an arrow, pointing directly to the toe that was to receive attention. Actually, I was quite impressed with this (yes, I've heard the horror stories of the past). 
Google image - "What did the doctor say?"
The second thing I am almost too embarrassed to mention, but heh, we're out here to share, not so?  Last week, my husband looked at me one day and suggested politely that I might like to borrow his nose-hair clipper. Feelings of deep humiliation overcame me as I began to wonder who else amongst my acquaintance might have noticed the offending growths which I have to say, I had overlooked myself just because it wasn't within my frame of reference.  I thought only men had gross stuff like nose hair? However, when I thought about my impending op and the anaesthetist looking up my nose, I was sufficiently motivated to deal with the problem - my husband having assured me that the little machine doesn't hurt. It didn't.  I'm really glad I did it now as the anaesthetist proved to be a lady.


  1. The arrow is a good thing! I had a friend that went in for a knee operation. The gave him spinal anesthesia, and although he couldn't feel anything he was aware of the fact they started to work on the wrong knee. Because he was awake he directed them to the correct knee. Well they had a 50/50 shot at it. Then you hear the horror stories. Guy goes in for a hernia operation, comes out with a peterdectomy by a drunk surgeon. Probably an urban legend, but for any surgery I may need, I intend to have Sharpie instructions all over my body, and certainly a "Do Not Cut Off" inscribed on pete (unfortunately in small font) and his two buddies he hangs with. They haven't been quite reduced to ornamental purposes only just yet, and I would like to keep them around for as long as I can.

    Ahhhh nasal hair, a true sign that you are still alive but getting older. Another high growth asset that I possess. The trouble with trimming both nasal and ear hair is that it seems to encourage yet greater efforts in regeneration. If I could only transplant that to the top of my head.

  2. Much giggling about 'small font' ! Sextant, you are so funny !!!! Now I get why you are so nervous of ops.

  3. It's like a dinner and movie reading this post. Totally enjoyed your post about the hospital covering their butt during your surgery. And the nose hair, so true, we woman think that only happens to men. Checking my nose hair now.....Ok, for now but definitely will keep checking. So your post was dinner and Sextants comment was the movie. Both an entertaining fun way to spend the time it took me to read this post. You two should take your show on the road :)

  4. My comments haven't been coming up - so trying again. Sextant is just a Renaissance man - an engineer, writer, comedian - who loves our girlie blogs.

    1. I have been called a lot of things, mostly involving four lettered words and south of the border anatomy nomenclature, but Renaissance man is a first. Thank you for the kind compliment.

      I am not sure that I would call your blog or Alicia's blog (link below) girlie.

      Yes some posts are, but both of you most often have interesting and serious posts which look at far deeper issues than just girlie stuff. There is nothing wrong with "girlie" blogs, but I have to admit I am not terribly interested in recipes or fashions.

    2. Wait I may have found the exception. Here is a girlie post on fashion I found interesting:

      From a pragmatic standpoint, I think I would find such bejeweling to be rather impractical. "Don't mess up my vajazzle!" Hmmm! There seems to be a built in contradiction there. Not to mention where such gems could end up. Yeeeeoowwwwlll!

      However a provocative variation may be to use sprinkles and jimmies for baked goods as a gemstone alternative.

    3. 'Baked goods' - just makes me think of that movie where Ben Stiller masturbates with such items. Busy checking out your other links....