Thursday, 17 November 2011

Moral Quandary


Like all parents, I've done my best to instil good values and discipline into my children. I understand that the pace of modern life is hectic especially when you have a very active toddler and a seven-month old to get to the shops. However, I have asked my daughter to give me at least a day's notice if she needs help as I do sometimes have my own commitments.  I know she thinks I don't have a life these days since I stopped working but I feel she shouldn't assume I am at her beck and call at the drop of a hat, unless the children are suddenly sick. So I got a message this morning: she needs my help if at all possible today to take them into town for their passport photos and documents.  As it happens, I arranged yesterday afternoon to go to movies this morning with two friends. We had been trying to find a date to suit everyone for a few days before that. It would not be a house on fire, if I pulled out, which of course, I would do in an emergency, but I still feel bad saying no to my daughter and I now worry that it will be my fault if my mischievous grandson runs away into the traffic and gets lost or run over while she is organising the baby into her pram. In my own mind I have no choice though: I always stick to a prior commitment.  My daughter says she forgot to phone me yesterday. Maybe the inconvenience of this expedition will jog her memory next time. (This is them)

9 comments:

  1. Well you are not alone. My son has a tendency to string my wife along with a smorgasbord of possibilities that would require a logic diagram, a computer with a 10 digit random number generator, and an appointments secretary to figure out. My wife puts up with that BS and is often disappointed because of apparent disturbances in the force, turbulence in the upper atmosphere, and astrological influences. When the lad tries to engage the old man in a similar puzzle of quantum possibility and relativistic times, I simply insist that he gives me a definite time and live with it, or otherwise forget it. I would like to think that my policy of tough love has disciplined the lad. Ha! The only time he talks to me is when he needs me to do something for him, otherwise he deals with my wife.

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  2. This describes kids so well...They think we do not have a life. They seem to call more when they need something! What would we do without them?

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  3. Yep - you both make good points! My husband - although he flatly denies it - drops everything if my daughter flaps her eyelashes.... My jobs, of course, are further down the priority list.

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  4. This is the reason I like living 600 miles away. If they need help from Gramma, they have to make special arrangements to get her there and I always have advance notice. On the other hand, I miss them tremendously, so that our times together are very precious.

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  5. "if my daughter flaps her eyelashes...."

    Aha! Now I know why you want those eyelashes for your car!

    Somewhere along in the end of my wife's pregnancy, our daughter (according to the ultra-sound image) grew a stinger. It was a bit of a shock actually, and I have spent my life somewhat pining for my lost daughter (although not enough that I was willing shoot for # 2). Well it is probably a fortunate thing because I doubt the world needs yet another spoiled rotten girl with daddy wrapped around her little finger. What the hell is wrong with men?

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  6. Your daughter is lovely, and your grandchildren are just darling. I understand your feelings. I seem to drop everything for my daughter when she needs me. That is not a good thing.

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  7. No, but we keep doing it, heh?

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